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Post by jordanl on Nov 1, 2006 16:23:26 GMT -5
On October 30, 2006 Abby Denning's (A.K.A. My girlfriend) Grandfather past away. He was in the hospital because his blood pressure was way off, and now she is in Iowa some where, she was feeling pretty down when she was in the hospital visiting him, but I'm not sure how to go about her now, I've had a grandfather pass away when I was small but I know that for each person it is different especially when its a guy suffering from it than a girl. She isn't showing signs of wanting to commit suicide from it, so thats a plus she is planning on being back in Sioux falls Thursday Night, and on Friday afternoon leaving for spearfish to celebrate her sisters birthday, but after that how can I go about comforting her without pushing her too close to the edge, I realize that during stressful times that the mind and soul seem more prone to commit suicide, I have seen and heard about things that she used to do, but I feel that since I have gone out with her for two years that I have convinced her that is not the way to go. I'm kind of lost now of how to go about this new development but I really want to help her if anyone has any ideas of how to help her through this time of her life could you please let me know...
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kim
Corporal
Posts: 79
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Post by kim on Nov 2, 2006 21:48:39 GMT -5
Just trying to understand you, Jordan. Abby is your girlfriend? Who was it that died, Jordan? Her friend?
I often think words aren't adequate in times of grief. Sometimes, I think the best thing is to just be there, just listen and try to understand her. You think she might consider suicide? If so, I think it is too big for you to carry Jordan, and I'd direct her to someone who is trained in that area. I know a great counselor, if you need her number Jordan... also someone really good to bounce these kinds of thoughts off of for yourself even. She doesn't charge either, if you can't afford it.
Let me know, ok?
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Post by denise on Nov 2, 2006 21:54:43 GMT -5
That is a tough one. Each person grieves in their own way and there are stages a person goes through in the process, not everyone goes through them the same. For some they want to be with other people and others they want to be alone to sort things out. I know for me I don't talk about the lose much and keep things inside. I would feel pressured if someone kept asking me how I felt, etc. For me I want to continue life as normal as possible and deal with my emotions on my own. For other people they want to talk about it. I guess you will have to determine how your friend deals with stuff and be sensitive to her needs. It will take time so the best thing is not to be in a hurry for things to be "back to normal" It is hard to know what to do so you must pray and trust God to give you the wisdom to know what to say and do. I will pray for you and her family. Keep us posted on how things are.
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Post by jordanl on Nov 3, 2006 17:28:16 GMT -5
Thanks for all the help, I've been told that I am a great councler on things like suicide, and about having a councler talk to her, that would just get her thinking down more on herself, because people in my generation in our school anyway feel that the problems that go in our live should stay with our friends and leave others out of it. but she is getting through it fairly well so its going alot better, she isnt thinking about suicide any more but when she comes tonight for the lock-in just try not too bother her too much about how she feels about things. you know how when your with a new group and you feel kindof aqward well I am kinda the buffer tonight for her....
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Post by joncentes on Nov 4, 2006 0:40:31 GMT -5
fix that who passsed away.!!
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kim
Corporal
Posts: 79
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Post by kim on Nov 4, 2006 10:31:13 GMT -5
What do you mean joncentes?
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Post by jordanl on Nov 5, 2006 13:12:41 GMT -5
I had a gramatical error in the first line it looked extremely like she passed away lol... so I fixed that right after he posted "fix it, who died" message. time to get my microsoft word back up and type in that before I post in the forums. I am losing my gramtical and spelling capabilities
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Post by admin on Jun 10, 2007 8:26:37 GMT -5
This is a board where people were discussing things close to their heart. I have no clue who you are who is putting trash on the site, but you are not welcome. Please know that if you continue, I will make it so only registered members can post on these boards. I invite you to introduce yourself and allow us to get to know you.
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